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Paralegal Want Ads: Why Don’t You Say What You Really Mean?

Paralegal Want Ads: Why Don’t You Say What You Really Mean?

Okay, maybe some of these ads do say what the prospective employer really means, while a few of them just make me scratch my head and wonder if I’m missing something…

“If you are content to read magazines, talk on the phone or text all day, please do not apply.” ~ Craigslist ad for Legal Secretary/Paralegal in New York (Just one guess as to what the last employee did all day – or maybe three.)

“GREET AND RECEIVE CLIENTS – MUST HAVE “APPEARANCE-GROOMING’ . ~ Craigslist ad for Receptionist in Los Angeles (Okay, it’s in ALL CAPS and EMPHASIZED WITH WEIRD DOUBLE AND SINGLE QUOTATION MARKS, SO IT’S CLEAR YOU BETTER BE PRESENTABLE-LOOKING AND NOT DRESS LIKE SNOOKI!!!!)

“If you do not have interest in working in a law office but are looking for ?just a job,? please do not waste our time and yours.” ~ Craigslist ad for a Legal Assistant in Los Angeles (? Do we really know what they are looking for?)

“Skilled, experienced paralegals at top law firms can make more than $100,000 per year. This is your opportunity to get paid while you get the training you need in a real work environment.” ~ Craigslist ad for a Paralegal in Dallas (Newbies, they don’t say you can make 100k per year at their firm, but are offering you the chance to make $7-$15 an hour for a real long time.)

“*be able to maintain the office, organize, shop for and order office supplies, and let us know when things need to be done” ~ Craigslist ad for an Office Assistant/File Clerk in Dallas (What things, no really, I need you to be more specific.)

“Witty” ~ Craigslist ad says “Upbeat PARALEGAL WANTED” in Boston (Wonder if that’s upbeat with or without anti-depressants? Bet they didn’t tell ya in paralegal school that you need to be the master of snappy repartee.)
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Practical Paralegalism welcomes reader submissions of want ads for legal staffers gone awry, even if it’s a weird, albeit amusing hobby to read them.

2 Responses to Paralegal Want Ads: Why Don’t You Say What You Really Mean?

Contact Info:

Lynne J. DeVenny, N.C. State Bar Certified Paralegal

Owner & Virtual Paralegal, DeVenny Paralegal Services

Email: lynne.devenny[at]gmail.com

Telephone: 336-582-0003

Inquiries are welcome, with free quotes available.

Meet Lynne:

Lynne DeVenny is a North Carolina State Bar Certified Paralegal with over 27 years of experience working on complex litigation cases, including medical malpractice, personal injury, workers’ compensation, and Social Security disability.

Disclosure: I am not a lawyer and cannot provide legal representation or legal advice.

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