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Virtual Paralegalism

The Blog Formerly Known As Practical Paralegalism

Saturday LOL: Hey Boss, I Need A Raise…

…’cause Other Companies Want Me Bad

Paralegal: Excuse me, Sir, may I talk to you?

Attorney: Sure, come on in. What can I do for you?

Paralegal: Well, Sir, as you know, I have been an employee of this prestigious law firm for over ten years.

Attorney: I know, you’re a valued employee here, plus you’re the only one who knows how the copy machine works.

Paralegal: I won’t beat around the bush. Sir, I would like a raise. I currently have four companies after me, and so I decided to talk to you first.

Attorney: A raise? I would love to give you a raise, but this is just not the right time.

Paralegal: I understand your position, and I know that the current economic downturn has had a negative impact on firm revenues, but you must also take into consideration my hard work, pro-activeness and loyalty to this company for over a decade. Plus, I am the only one who knows how the copy machine works.

Attorney: Taking into account these factors and considering I don’t want to start a brain drain or learn how to use the copy machine myself, I’m willing to offer you a ten percent raise and an extra five days of vacation time. How does that sound?

Paralegal: Great! It’s a deal! Thank you, Sir!

Attorney: Before you go, just out of curiosity, what companies were after you?

Paralegal: Oh, the Electric Company, the Gas Company, the Water Company and the Mortgage Company!
Thanks to my co-worker, Jamie, for sharing this morning joke, which I modified a wee bit to suit many of my readers, who are also in demand by the same companies!

One Response to Saturday LOL: Hey Boss, I Need A Raise…

Contact Info:

Lynne J. DeVenny, N.C. State Bar Certified Paralegal

Owner & Virtual Paralegal, DeVenny Paralegal Services

Email: lynne.devenny[at]

Telephone: 336-582-0003

Inquiries are welcome, with free quotes available.

Meet Lynne:

Lynne DeVenny is a North Carolina State Bar Certified Paralegal with over 27 years of experience working on complex litigation cases, including medical malpractice, personal injury, workers’ compensation, and Social Security disability.

Disclosure: I am not a lawyer and cannot provide legal representation or legal advice.

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