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Virtual Paralegalism

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Someone Needs a Spanking

So sue me, I’m old school.

Wait, kiddos, don’t sue me. I’ve never spanked you, although I did make you pay that huge cell phone bill you racked up for excess text messages.

That would be grounds for a lawsuit for some kiddos. Seriously, have you guys seen the one about the punks plaintiffs that sued their mama for bad mothering? 

Lowering the Bar reports that it was dismissed, but raise your hand, paralegals, legal professionals, and fairly normal parents, if you ever committed any of the following outrageous acts:

  • Got divorced and shared custody of the kiddos
  • Showed favoritism at any time to any of the kiddos
  • Took one kiddo to an auto show and not the others
  • Negotiated how much money you gave a kiddo for a prom dress or “disco dances” (Huh? Wasn’t disco dead in 2006?)
  • Asked to see receipts for medical expenses
  • Did not send cash to your grown kiddos in their birthday cards
  • Did not send care packages to your kiddos in college
  • Called the other parent the “Disneyland” parent
  • Lived with a significant other you were not married to
  • Refused to return the Popsicle jewelry box the little darling made for you
  • Forced the kiddos to buckle their seat belts
  • Gave your kiddo a midnight curfew for the homecoming dance

I know, we’re all screwed, right?

But you could see where a parent might want to intentionally inflict some emotional distress if she birthed the little prizes that filed the aforementioned lawsuit, couldn’t you? And was the ex-spouse of the attorney and baby daddy that filed it?

I’m going to go increase the youngest kiddo’s allowance now, and hope she remembers me fondly if she’s feeling litigious in the future.

Source:  Lowering the Bar

6 Responses to Someone Needs a Spanking

  1. Years ago, my then 7-8 year-old son decided one day that he wanted to call the police because I was being unfair to him. Unfair was defined as: e.g., homework had to be done on a Friday; he was forced to clean his room after days of it being a disaster area (you know, just so I'd be able to see parts of his floor), and other such equally egregious parental torture. I dialed the precinct for him. The officer had my son rattle off his list of grievances, after which the officer asked to speak with me. The officer informed me (which I already knew) that I had done nothing worthy of the call and said that if I wanted to file a petition against my son in court, I should, and he promptly gave me the address – LOL! I assured him it was unnecessary, and that my son was actually a good kid, just unhappy with my rules b/c they interfered with his Nintendo plans and such. And that was that.

    I was reminded that day, however, that NYS parents too have legal rights,(vis-a-vis their kids)- not to sue them necessarily – but to, in essence, take their kids to court . . . for what amounts to being a huge pain in the butt!

  2. Boy, Stacey, you sure could've exposed yourself to a lawsuit there for trying to ruin his life…lol. But it sounds like you ran into a super-understanding law enforcement officer who'd had a kid or two of his own!

  3. Nice blog, Paralegal Training, but it needs an "About Me" page (unless I missed it?). I know you may not want to disclose your identity or location, but sharing a little about your experience, your specialty areas, and your education, even "bachelor's degree in psychology" or "NALA-certified paralegal" helps establish your credentials as a legal professional and identify your blawgger voice.

  4. Saw this story on MSN – I couldn't believe it. What got me was the story said the suit actually went on for TWO YEARS before dismissal.

    Lynne – if your list is all it takes to get sued by kiddoos, I better start saving up for an attorney now because in 10 years I'm going to be sued!

Contact Info:

Lynne J. DeVenny, N.C. State Bar Certified Paralegal

Owner & Virtual Paralegal, DeVenny Paralegal Services

Email: lynne.devenny[at]

Telephone: 336-582-0003

Inquiries are welcome, with free quotes available.

Meet Lynne:

Lynne DeVenny is a North Carolina State Bar Certified Paralegal with over 27 years of experience working on complex litigation cases, including medical malpractice, personal injury, workers’ compensation, and Social Security disability.

Disclosure: I am not a lawyer and cannot provide legal representation or legal advice.

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